About the power of a perspective-oriented mindset

If there is a superpower that I wish we all possessed, it would be mastering the power of perspective. It is a skill, an ability that has fantastic potential no matter in what area you want to use it.

What is perspective? For me is the ability of a person to generate various points of view on the same observed phenomenon in the most possible circumstances. It is the art of living: to be present, to be flexible and to time the action & the involvement of the individual through the body & the mind in an optimal manner.

It has to do with being free. Has it ever happened to you that your whole life was changed in a moment, only thanks to the fact that somebody offered you a new perspective on something? When I was little I was afraid of the dart. When it is dark, one can not see. I was puzzled by the fact that in one moment I was in my room, minding my own business, and in the next one, with the flip of a switch all of the sweet knowledge & predictability had disappeared from this space of mine: suddenly anything could become real, challenging my weaknesses, fears, putting at test my love & trust towards my family, my community, the world itself. It felt like in the dark there were no rules anymore, no safety, just the self-defence mode of protecting my own life. One day my parents told me that there is nothing to fear when you do not see anything anymore. Darkness doesn’t mean the end of rational, well-established existence, it just means the lack of light. When I managed to understand, that when there is darkness, basically everything stays the same, just without the light in the world and just temporarily, until the morning – I became free. From that moment on I played in the dark, swam in the dark, ran in the dark, danced in the dark, walked alone in the dark, and sometimes when I had sleepless nights I invited the darkness to cover me darkness itself to cover me and bring me comfort. I became free just by receiving a perspective from my parents. How fantastic is that?

It has to do with a momentum for action. Have you ever had the experience that you want to change something in your life, but all the actions that you tried for a while created the feeling of dragging you and all your issues in an energy-depleting manner? But only until somebody offered you a new way of understanding life or at least some aspect of it. Once you embodied this new understanding, this breakthrough of new understanding unleashed a wave of energy that enabled you to implement all the changes you deemed important in order for you to thrive. I remember when I first managed to embody change as an adult: consciously. I had a teacher who helped me through my resistance towards some of my father’s patterns. “I want him to change!” I said, and I produced all the patterns of a spoiled teenager. “He won’t,”, my teacher said, with patience. “But you could.” “How?” I asked, irritatedly, like she would be a mosquito or something. “By loving him without any condition, just because he is your father. This way you will have the space to change, and so will he. If you change: he will also do that. Your change will be the invitation for him to change, all rooted in love.” I was understanding her words, but not getting the meaning, right away. Luckily her words created a ripple effect, thanks to which I managed to accept, love and see how an amazing person he is, just before he died. In this process of acceptance, love and appreciation I also grew as a person, as a man and as a human being. 

It has to do with offering space to whatever needs to be expressed, understood, and accepted. These things are very important and they are lurking usually on the periphery of our conscious mind waiting to be invited in. These things are important because they are transcendental. A lovely philosopher said once (I am paraphrasing here), that the big questions of existence can not be answered, they can only be transcended – you grow out of them, and they cease to be an issue anymore. Has it ever happened to you, that you are terribly busy with some big topic of your life for as long as it feels forever – and once, when you have accepted that things are, as they are, and it is all right that way: suddenly everything changes? For almost all of my teenagehood, the topic of a girlfriend was an issue. What do I need? What do I want? What can I offer? Why do I want what I want? These questions felt like they were there for an eternity, always without some sort of an answer, but not really. And there was a moment when there was no noise anymore from the questions, instead, there was a curious space to accept whatever is there to be expressed in this dimension. And suddenly, with the space for an invitation to the outside world, perspective started to flow in. And through these perspectives, a new understanding started to emerge – one that was integral, and sustainable towards me & my potential partner. And once these new understandings found a place in me, I met the person with whom I could build a life. Without acceptance, surrender and curiosity I would not be able to create an understanding & attitude towards relationships, that could last. Even if I would have met her – I would have ruined the relationship because of our insecurities, concerns, fears, and worries. 

I strive to have perspective. This keeps me grounded, and free. Grounded in reality, in the now, not lost in the translation of the past or the forecast of the future. And free – I am talking about real freedom, the one that can be uncomfortable, tough to swallow, and a challenge to manage – and once I manage it I know I become a wiser and better person, at least for a while.

Life is worth living. For me life is about freedom: to do whatever I want from whatever I can in order to serve the rest of the world to live better. And the perspective-oriented mindset makes my life every day so much easier.

Thanks for reading this blog post. We have created a program, that has at its core the perspective-oriented mindset: it is called Thrive online retreat, and now the registrations for the program are open!

What is Thrive? I invite you to read more about it on our website or read the Info letter of the program, but in short, it is a 6-week long online retreat, where experiences are playing a big role, together with the exploration of self and the world itself. The focus is on state management and an empowering, life-friendly mindset. We designed it in a way that we meet online, yet it has a real impact on your everyday context – it contains a lot of fun challenges, guided meditations, and tasks that enable you to understand more, grow more and gain more perspective.

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